If only…

autismpuzzleHe stands seemingly oblivious to his surroundings.  He is in his own world…his own mental bubble of exclusion. 

He scans the room.  For at least five minutes he stares at one place with laser precision; his eyes fixed.

What does he see? What is he thinking?

He scans the room again as he is escorted to his chair.   He sits down slowly turning his head from side to side as if he is looking at something or sees someone invisible to me.   

He smiles.  He begins rocking back and forth in rhythmic motion.  He stops abruptly; he sighs. He pauses intermittently to focus on another place in the large open room that holds the mysteries I will never know. 

He begins grinding his teeth in harmony with his rocking back and forth.

Harmonious in motion…teeth grinding… rocking back and forth.

He stops abruptly.

Silence as he stares into nowhere, yet somewhere in his mind; somewhere I cannot go. 


I pray, silently to connect somehow.

He speaks no words.  If only I knew what he was thinking, perhaps the mystery would be solved.


“Lord, You know.”

If only I could see what he sees when he gazes into space.  


“Lord, You see.”

If only I could be a part of his world.  Would it be better than the reality of mine?

The teeth grinding was very annoying, but so are the words of those around me–meaningless chatter and negativity are just as annoying. 

If only I could put the puzzle pieces together in his world that apparently only he can. If only….





A certified Christian counselor, writer, self-published author, committed to encouraging and inspiring others through the power of words, written and verbal.

Tagged with: , , , , , , ,

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *